I will look forward to hearing anything and everything from Dietz, as always...
In the meantime, about dearVRmonitor. This is mainly designed to be a monitoring plugin...not so much as a tool to bounce your final mix through. You'd have to label your final bounce with something like "ONLY LISTEN WITH HEADPHONES" for it to be of any use. yes if you only plan to listen through headphones and you only want your listeners to always use headphones, then you could definitely render out the final mix through dearVRmonitor in order to obtain a binaural mix.
Now the question is do you really need or want to do that if you are working primarily in stereo? Probably not. As you said, dearVRmonitor is introducing cross talk, by design, to simulate as if you were sitting in front of real monitors where both ears hear some audio from both speakers, unlike in headphones where they hear each one side of the stereo mix in isolation.
If your intended audience will only be using headphones...and if you are mixing in stereo..then I see no point to using dearVRmonitor at all.
If you want your audience to listen with headphones but also allow non-headphones... Then you might want to monitor your mix through dearVRmonitor in order to hear the stereo separation that your non-headphone listeners will eventually be experiencing. But do not render the final mix through dearVRmonitor. Only use it to monitor your mix. dearVRmonitor is mainly meant as a monitoring device to simulate a variety of loudspeaker listening environments.
EXCEPT for one possible situation which is if you are doing 2D and 3D mixes, and headphones, then you need to use something like dearVRmonitor in order to hear the immersive audio in your headphones...and if you render the final mix through dearVRmonitor...then label it with "ONLY LISTEN ON HEADPHONES", they would hear the same thing you hear.
Mainly people are not going to distribute 2D/3D binaural renditions as such, they will be distributing Dolby Atmos MP4 renditions which have to be played back on systems that support Dolby Atmos...such as Apple Air Pod pros...or Sonos systems, etc.. Other then VR gaming applications, the main point of using dearVRmonitor binaural is strictly for monitoring purposes in order to simulate real world non-headphone listening environments.